Why Do I Feel So Ugly? (2024)

You sometimes might ask yourself, “why am I so ugly?” although you aren’t. But tips, such as practicing self-acceptance and speaking with a professional, may help you.

Sometimes you might not feel your best, experience negative thoughts. You can find ways to cope with these thoughts and embrace your appearance. It also can help you find happiness and fulfillment as you overcome negative self-talk.

Society makes it seem normal to use filters, wear heavy makeup, and do other things to mask a natural appearance. Giving into this culture can make you feel unattractive, interfering with your self-confidence.

It can also lead to fixating on your perceived flaws and blaming your appearance for not fitting in.

If you ever feel ugly, this information can help you determine how to cope. Overcoming the issue can help you find happiness and fulfillment rather than focusing on your perceived flaws.

Research shows that people with an “average face” are more often viewed as attractive. They have symmetrical faces, with both sides looking the same. It’s a beauty standard that often causes people to feel unattractive or ugly.

If you don’t fit these standards, you might feel ugly, although you’re not.

Feeling like you’re alone or don’t fit in can sometimes lead to blaming your appearance. You might think you’d fit in better if you looked like others, causing you to compare your facial features, size, or shape to other people.

If a potential romantic partner turns you down or acts disinterested, it can also cause you to feel bad about your appearance. It may make you doubt your worth and cause you to see yourself as unattractive.

The first thing to remember is that you’re not ugly, and while these feelings can come and go, they aren’t the truth. It often stems from being around people with different ideas of beauty standards.

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Mental health conditions associated with self-image

Some mental health conditions can affect self-image, including the following:

  • Body dysmorphic disorder (BDD): (BDD) involves spending excessive time looking at or trying to fix your perceived flaws. It can also lead to stressing about these parts of your body or going out of your way to hide them. You may also notice signs, such as skin picking or that you frequently check the mirror.
  • Depression: Depression can lead to low self-esteem and possibly cause you to feel worthless. Unhelpful thoughts and feelings that arise may make it difficult to tend to your needs.
  • Eating disorders: If you live with an eating disorder you might believe your appearance and body type are unattractive, even when everyone else says you look good.
  • Gender dysphoria: Gender dysphoria is when there’s a mismatch between the sex assigned to you at birth and your true gender. It may make you feel ugly because it could involve pressure to conform to expectations you don’t relate to. But how you feel is valid and you’re not alone.

If thoughts of being unattractive interfere with your day-to-day life, consider speaking with a mental health professional who can determine if an underlying condition is contributing to negative thoughts you have regarding your appearance.

How to Find a Therapist

Looking for a therapist but not sure where to start? Psych Central’s How to Find Mental Health Support resource can help.

1. Practice self-compassion

When you feel ugly, practicing self-compassion can help you feel better about yourself. Practicing self-compassion also involves understanding and regulating your emotions.

One way to practice self-compassion is to treat yourself how you treat friends and loved ones. You can remind yourself that you shouldn’t say it to yourself if you wouldn’t say it to someone you respect.

Additionally, you can replace negative self-talk with positivity and encouragement.

2. Prioritize self-care

You can prioritize self-care routines that help you feel good about your appearance. Getting enough sleep, spending time outside, and doing things that help you relax can help you feel better about yourself.

3. Appreciate what your body does

When you don’t feel good about yourself, you might not have an easy time thinking of the positive aspects of your appearance.

According to a large Hungarian study of adolescent girls, there’s a connection between body appreciation and self-esteem. Try to shift your mindset to be appreciative of the things your body physically does. This can help improve your self-esteem and life satisfaction.

4. Make a few changes

You can make a few changes if you don’t feel good in your wardrobe or your current hairstyle. Making changes to complement your features and boost your self-confidence can make a difference.

5. Living a fit and healthy lifestyle

Not liking how you look sometimes involves your current lifestyle choices. Living a healthy lifestyle will make you feel better, helping you like your appearance more than usual.

You could feel better about yourself by exercising regularly and making healthy food choices. Remember that you are beautiful as you are now, so it’s your choice to make. Consider choosing activities and practices that you enjoy.

6. Accept yourself

When you feel ugly, accepting who you are and how you look may help you feel better. Try to embrace your appearance and learn to love your flaws. Everyone has their quirks and flaws, but it’s what makes them special and unique.

Self-acceptance and embracing styles you love will boost your self-confidence, making you look and feel more attractive.

One way you can do this is by wearing clothes or jewelry and incorporating other styles you love. When you enjoy how things look on yourself, you can notice a significant improvement.

7. Remember why people like you

People don’t like spending time with you because of how you look. They enjoy you for your personality and other positive traits. When you remember this, you may have an easier time loving yourself as you are now.

8. Understand people don’t notice as much as you think

Sometimes you might feel ugly if you assume everyone notices your physical imperfections more than they do. While these things might come to your mind daily, others don’t always pay attention, but you’ll feel like they do.

It may make you worry more than necessary about an acne breakout, an unflattering outfit, or imperfect hair. Try to remember that you judge yourself more harshly than anyone else does, even when it doesn’t seem like it.

The things you dislike about yourself might be characteristics others don’t notice at all or they enjoy looking at it.

9. Seek professional help

Talking with a therapist can help you determine why you feel unattractive. It can also help you find ways to cope with and overcome these feelings.

Your negative emotions can impact your life, but getting professional help can improve your well-being and how you view yourself.

When you feel ugly, it causes you to lose ownership of your appearance and experience mental health disruptions.

Your body’s purpose isn’t to benefit others and doesn’t have to look a certain way. You can experience fulfillment and happiness no matter how you look, and you can improve your self-esteem.

If you notice unhelpful thoughts and feelings about your appearance affect your day-to-day life consider speaking with a mental health professional.

Why Do I Feel So Ugly? (2024)

FAQs

What to do if you feel ugly? ›

How to improve self-image
  1. Practice self-compassion. ...
  2. Prioritize self-care. ...
  3. Appreciate what your body does. ...
  4. Make a few changes. ...
  5. Living a fit and healthy lifestyle. ...
  6. Accept yourself. ...
  7. Remember why people like you. ...
  8. Understand people don't notice as much as you think.
Apr 19, 2023

Is it normal to feel like you are ugly? ›

It's not uncommon to feel ugly when you just don't like some aspect of your appearance. Maybe you know you'd like to update your wardrobe or change your hairstyle, but you have no idea how to get started. There's nothing wrong with wanting a new look, and the internet has made it easy to try out changes inexpensively.

Why do I feel extremely ugly? ›

A person is not born hating how they look. Self-defeating thoughts develop from external conditions, such as critical parents or experiencing bullying, that bring about self-hatred. Additionally, certain internal circ*mstances, such as mental health conditions, can also skew our self-view.

How do you know that you are unattractive? ›

  • People tell you are ugly.
  • You never or rarely got compliments about your appearance.
  • People are less friendly, less interested and less chatty towards people they perceive as ugly.
  • People avoid you.
  • People don't smile.
  • People look at you with disgust or with an unhappy look on their face.
Jan 18, 2018

How to feel cute when you feel ugly? ›

6 Ways to Instantly Feel Beautiful
  1. Stand (and Sit) Tall. ...
  2. Be an Observer, Not a Judge. ...
  3. Say "Thanks" ...
  4. Wear Color. ...
  5. Loosen Up. ...
  6. View Yourself in a Flattering Light.

How can I look pretty? ›

Things You Should Know. Maintain good grooming habits: shower and wash your face regularly, and keep your hair and nails neat. Wear comfy clothes that fit well and make you feel good. Take care of your body by getting plenty of sleep, eating a variety of low-fat, nutrient-rich foods, and exercising 2–3 times a week.

How to deal with being unattractive? ›

Find things you love about yourself.

Try to make a list of things you love about yourself that have nothing to do with your physical appearance. Consider qualities about yourself that make you feel happy or confident. For example, you might think about how much you care for your friends, or how artistic you are.

Why do I look ugly in pictures but not in the mirror? ›

It's because mirrors gives us a 3D figure of what we see, so some imperfections on our faces will be dismissed. But when you take a photo, it's a one-whole still image. So we begin to realize our flaws and imperfections. Perfectly normal!

Am I ugly or do I just have body dysmorphia? ›

How do you tell the difference between normal appearance concerns and BDD? If you spend at least an hour a day thinking about your perceived appearance flaws, and this preoccupation interferes with day-to-day functioning or causes significant emotional distress, then the person is diagnosed with BDD.

How to stop feeling ugly and fat? ›

How to stop a fat and ugly attack
  1. Ask yourself what *really* is going on. If you weren't thinking about your body (or food) right now, what would you be thinking? ...
  2. Remind yourself you are worth more than your appearance, size + body. ...
  3. Be kind. ...
  4. Accept your body through action.

Why do I feel like I look so bad? ›

Body dysmorphic disorder causes people to feel worried that parts of their body are flawed in some way. It's related to obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD). People with this mental health condition spend hours concerned that something is wrong with their looks.

Can being ugly cause anxiety? ›

Body dysmorphic disorder is a mental health condition in which you can't stop thinking about one or more perceived defects or flaws in your appearance — a flaw that appears minor or can't be seen by others. But you may feel so embarrassed, ashamed and anxious that you may avoid many social situations.

Do I see myself uglier than I am? ›

According to psychology, when we see ourselves in the mirror, we tend to think of ourselves as prettier, than how we actually look to others, in real life. That's the perception of the mirror, vs what you look like to others in real life. It's actually the other way around.

How can I tell I'm attractive? ›

Nine ways to notice your attractiveness
  • You get compliments about your smile. ...
  • You don't get many compliments. ...
  • You grab people's attention and make them stare. ...
  • A person's behavior seems strange or over-attentive. ...
  • People gravitate toward you. ...
  • People send you messages or contact you out of the blue.
Apr 10, 2024

How do I know if my face is attractive? ›

The concept of a “perfect” face leans heavily towards symmetry and balance. Typically, features such as larger eyes, a slender nose, pronounced cheekbones, plump lips, and overall harmonious proportions are deemed attractive.

What is it called when you feel ugly? ›

Overview. Body dysmorphic disorder is a mental health condition in which you can't stop thinking about one or more perceived defects or flaws in your appearance — a flaw that appears minor or can't be seen by others. But you may feel so embarrassed, ashamed and anxious that you may avoid many social situations.

What does it mean to feel ugly? ›

1. very unattractive or unpleasant to look at; offensive to the sense of beauty; displeasing in appearance. 2. disagreeable; unpleasant; objectionable.

What to do if someone says they feel ugly? ›

Here are a few tips to get started!
  1. Compliment them on something not related to their body. ...
  2. Ask them about other things going on in their life. ...
  3. Reframe and challenge negative thoughts. ...
  4. Follow encouraging and positive social media. ...
  5. Practice self care together. ...
  6. Listen non-judgementally. ...
  7. Know your resources.
Mar 26, 2020

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